*background music plays*
"Oh my God."
"Oh my God!"
"That's amazing!"
"Fucking love barbershop quartets!"
"uhm.."
*high five* "Top of the morning to ya laddies! My name is Jacksepticeye"
"and welcome.."
"..finally"
"to Cuphead!"
"Aw, it's so good!"
"I've been waiting for this game for so long, a lot of us have. Ever since they first showed off this game..."
"everybody has been excited for it, and it looks fucking phenomenal."
"I always knew the art style was gonna be good because we-we've seen it a bunch..."
"and we've kind of seen the game in action and trailers and that, but I haven't paid attention to anything from the game for..."
"I'd say about a year. I-I look up news about it, but I haven't looked at any trailers or footage or anything..."
"I haven't seen anything of the-the full released game now that it's actually out,"
"because I wanted to surprise myself with it."
"I didn't know the soundtrack was gonna be this good..."
"which is also nice because I got the deluxe edition vinyl."
"So...now I'm fuckin really excited to listen to that!"
"I just got the deluxe vinyl because I really like the art of it. Little did I know the music was actually gonna be phenomenal."
"Okay, I just love barbershop quartets. They're really good, but if you don't know what this game is, this is a game they..."
"announced a while ago and it's like a..."
"a side-scrolling game where you shoot things from your fingers and kill bosses and whatever."
"It was supposed to be a boss rush game. The original idea for the game was just fighting bosses..."
"I think, like a bullet hell game..?"
"But then after a while people liked the idea of the game so much that they wanted a full game,"
"...so they took a really long time to release the game because they were building actual..."
"levels to go through and more enemies and more scenarios and..."
"like...just the aesthetic alone. It's the really really old like.."
"...Disney style the really really old cartoony style and they..."
"fucking nailed it! Like, this is as close to that style you're ever ever gonna get in a game..."
"...and I can't believe just how good it looks, but let's get in and actually play the game instead of me just talking about it."
"Even the fucking options menu looks amazing~!"
"...Resolution...?"
"No! All right, who cares?! I don't know what's going on. Let's just get into the game. I just wanna play."
*smol dance break*
"..Oh my God!"
"Look at this! Once upon a time in a magical place called Inkwell Isle there were two brothers named Cuphead and Mugman."
"They lived without a care under the watchful eye of the wise Elder Kettle."
"One day the two boys wandered far from home,"
"and despite the Elder Kettle's many warnings, ended up on the wrong side of the tracks..."
"and into the Devil's Casino."
"Inside, Cuphead and Mugman soon found themselves on a winning streak at the Craps table."
"Hot dawg!" exclaimed King Dice, the casino's sleazy manager."
"These fellas can't lose!"
"Nice run, boys," laughed a newcomer. The brothers gasped. It with the casino's owner - the Devil himself!"
"Now, how about we raise the stakes?" he suggested with a toothy grin."
*referring to the Devil* "...It's my brother."
"Win one more roll, and all the loot in my casino is yours!" the Devil boomed."
"But if you lose, I'll have your souls!
"Deal?"
"Cuphead, blinded by easy riches, nodded and grabbed the dice for a throw."
"Good gosh, Cuphead, no," cried Mugman, for he understood the danger, but it was too late."
"Snake eyes!" laughed the Devil while slamming the floor. "You lose!"
"The brothers trembled in fear as he loomed over them. "Now, how about those souls?"
"The brothers pleaded for their very lives. "Th-there must be another w-way to repay you," Mugman stammered.
"Yes, p-please, mister!" Cuphead added
"Hmm perhaps there is," the Devil snickered, pulling out a parchment
"I have a here a list of my runaway debtors. Collect their souls for me,
and I just might pardon you two mugs."
"Now get going!" the Devil roared, kicking the boys out the most-- out most rudely
"You have till midnight tomorrow to collect every one of those souls! Otherwise, I'll be the one collecting yours!"
Cuphead and Mugman were terribly frightened and ran away as fast as they could
"C'mon, Mug!" panted Cuphead. "We have to find the Elder Kettle. He'll know what to do!"
Fucking hell yes. I am so into this
It's crazy how much they make it appear like it's an old screen. Like an old CRT monitor
What a fine pickle you boys have gotten yourself into. I know you don't want to be pawns of the devil!
But if you refuse, I can't bear to imagine your fates
You must play along for now
Collect those contracts, and you'd best be ready for some nasty business
your debtor friends won't be very friendly once you confront them
In fact, I expect they'll transform into terrible beasts!
Now, take this potion
So they won't hang you out to dry. It will give you the most remarkable magic abilities
Now go to my writing desk and use the mystical inkwell there. You need to prepare yourself for a scrap
Aw fuck yeah even the fucking
the idle animation
Okay, I can point up because I'm getting ready to shoot shit
oh that's not good
oh I don't like these buttons
Okay, I might have to change these
Because X right now is to shoot
and that's kind of annoying why can't I just use the triggers
Ah, okay, there we go. Now it's on the trigger
Nice, okay, I'm getting it. I'm getting it. Tutorial. Yes. Let's go. I want to figure out how to play this game
Tutorial. Duck
Okay
jump
dash
- ah okay, so I can go under sections alright. shoot hold for rapid fire
pewpewpewpewpew
pewpewpewpewpew
Lock hold to stay in one place while aiming
ah, okay
So good aw, I have to shoot this
BOOM that explosions really nice parry slap jump while airborne - another fire interactive objects Oh
This also builds your super jump meter.
Oh that might be weird what's going on. It's a ghost
[weird echo voice] Thank yooou
Okay, that's two player only mode right X move
Woah!
Hadouken!
collect coins to purchase items from the shop
And exit. is that all I needed to know? Apparently, this game is hard as balls. That's all I've heard
I haven't actually watched any of the boss fights or any of the levels or anything like that from the full released game
But that's all I'm hearing people say is that how hard this game is so and I'm not the best of games
But um I beat Sans in Undertale, so I'm amazing
Okay, okay
Off I go off I go
Right I can do this I can do this cuz apparently the levels get aww, that's cute
Oh my god the music in this game is amazing
Hello friend
Hey fellas looks like you're in for it now, eh?
Well, I used to be the same way, always gettin' into trouble running jumping shootin
But now I prefer just strolling around and going to the pictures. But hey, lemme me give ya a hand! Take this
woah, holy shit
They give me three gold coins already
what's this
forest foodies run and gun
Oh, this is an extra level. Okay. Got it. We're into it
Oh my god
Oh, fuck
What's up fellas? How's it going? Do you want to die?
Cuz I can oblige. Uh even they fucking explosions of the dudes dying is amazing
So this apparently all this stuff wasn't in the game at first. They added it in way later
Oh wait I can't fucking jump on heads?
What the fuck this is gonna be hard
Sorry Mr. Flower man, I'm going to have to kill you. so that's what the game is all about
Is dodging shit like this, like over and over and over again. Is this one of the pink things that I can interact with? No
Oh you didn't die oh shit so
Oh god there's just so much on screen at once
So apparently the bosses are really hard because of that so I'm going to die a lot
Fuckin died already Jesus. I got this fuck the thing to get used to is when to stop
Ow! shit I'm down to one health already
Fuck are you? Go away
God dammit okay Jesus Christ
And begin it's gonna take everything out of me
Alright Jack. Take your time
Take your time, and you can do this. I also fuck
I keep forgetting what their moves are. I'm gonna die again already fuck
I'm not good at this
I also forgot that I have a fucking dash that I can use
Show your mushroom face
See these guys these are the ones I hate
Because I keep forgetting I'm like shooting other guys, and then their shit is in the air
Oh god, another hit and I'm dead
Boom nice furthest I've been folks
Can I get health? Is there actually health in the levels or am I just... fucked
Once I take damage, am I just gone? acorn maker dammit. I'm not good at this
Leave me the fuck alone
Am I actually hitting this thing? Oh Jesus thank Christ
I would like some health, please
Just any will do
Okay, okay, okay? Oh Jesus, okay fuck
Okay
I've been so looking forward to this game, and now it's fucking taking me for a right. Oh, please
Oh thank god
It was level one.
Oh, Christ Almighty. I didn't get all the things
Aw, it's so good
Skill level two that's not too bad B - a brand new record. That's the highest record you go to see from me folks
We're never getting higher than that. Wait, shop. Let me buy some stuff
Huzzah I opened up a thing. Okay, I have eight coins. Porkrind's Emporium. Oh I've seen this dude
Yeah, he was one of the very earlier earliest concepts from the game that people were showing
chaser chaos orbit long range with below average damage no aiming required
Okay an extra hit point. That's incredibly useful. I can technically get both
Adds additional hit point but likely weakens your attack power. Oh come on game really? fucking ruthless
Spread short-range with great damage if you can keep you close to the target
Smoke bombs invisible dash you will not take damage during a dash a great defence maneuver. That's nice
Can I only buy one? Great coverage with average damage aim backward for maximum range I think
this first of all
P sugar automatic Perry the first party move is automatic all you need to do is jump
Okay, yeah, the parrying system I don't get yet. Can I just jump into dudes?
First parry move's automatic, okay
Invisible dash sounds really good
cuz then I'll just dash so that means I'm not in the air, so I can't get hit while I dash
Yeah, three and three. Aw, if only I had one more. If only I was better at the first level! Could've got both of these
I might get this as well
Coffee super meter continuously fills in addition to what you earned, that's good
Good bye. Bye, Mr. Pig Man. So now I should be
Now you gots to equip those new, p- no I'm not doing that voice, it'll tear up my neck
You gots to equip those new purchases if you want to use them. Look at your equipped card, ya bums
Oh
Shot a pea shooter. Okay, I don't have a shot b. The supers not anything. Aw, fuck
So I can only have one of these equipped
Aw, that sucks
If I'd known that, I wouldn't have got it
Botanic panic
Difficulty selections simple or regular. We'll do regular for now and see how I get on and see if I suck it
Oh god do I have to- is this a boss fight? Oh shit
Okay, I got this
BOOM
Nice oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck
Oh shit I was like, did I do it?
Oh I don't like this. I don't like this. I don't like this. I don't like this oh fuck
Okay, that's not so bad I can deal with this
I can deal with this. I got this
Oh shit it's tears are faster, okay, that's cool, he's a giant onion and he's crying
aw fuck aw fuck
Ah shit
fuck!
aw fuck
Here we go just stay in the one place or don't
You got to lure them aaahh
fuck
this is so hARD
Kill him kill him kill him kill him dead
fUCKIT
Oh I'm lean mean, and full of beta-carotene. Okay. I was so close that was the last guy
Okay, buddy boy if you want to tussle with me you're gonna have to try harder than that Jackaboy and
Cuphead have got what it takes to go all the way
Fuck I wasn't supposed to take damage from him. I need a double jump
Okay, this guy is super easy
By right I shouldn't be taking any damage from this fucker, and I should be using him to build my meter
Wah wah
Oh crybaby bitch
I've got your number, see?
Okay do all the damage I can right off the bat
Okay, I got this. I know how we operate this time
As long as I can destroy enough carrots at once nice
Nice!
Dude I'm a regular ol' Killamon
fuck!
please die please die please die please die
Aw fuck that's a lot of carrots
don't die don't die don't die don't die don't die
don't die don't die don't die
Come on! Die!
[celebrations huzzah]
Aw yeah! I fuckin did it I knew he was gonna die that time he had to I was doin' so much damage
oh man
Okay, I need to figure out this parry system
I need to figure out what I'm doing with that C+
See, you're never gonna get better than the B - again
because it showed me in this tutorial that I like jump and then jump with something else so maybe you have to do that
I don't know
Did I get any money for that? Sole contractor, the root pack. Oh, I got one of them you get the root pack solo contract
Nice okay, I can deal with that that's no problem
Don't worry know where I'm going right now. I might actually leave this episode here
That's a good first chunk of introduction to this game
But I'm so fucking excited to play more of this this game is amazing. I love it already. It's hard as balls, but it's
It's because the thing that gets me is that not only do I not know the parry system
so that's all so I'm gonna end it here so I can try and practice that small bit, but what gets me is
The movement. Like the movements really good, but there's so much going on at once that
My brain doesn't know when to switch off and go between
static movement and just shooting around me, to moving forward and shooting in different directions, so
Stuff piles up on me very quickly after that, but hopefully I get better. I just hope that I can finish the game
I'm probably gonna have a lot of suffering and pain as I go through this, but it's fun
Because every time I die it feels like it's my fault
So it's just it's just me getting used to it and dodging so when I'm not good at bullet
Hell games anyway, but with enough practice. Hopefully I get better if now
Thank you guys so much for watching this episode if you liked it punch that like button in the face
LIKE A BOSS
and high fives all 'round
thank you, guys, and I will see all you dudes in the next video!
Oh, sorry, you're still here? Why? Show's over
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