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Back in Vegas 47 was yelling to Diana
over speakerphone while fixing his new Uzi
so it would shoot magnums.
"They tried to blow me up!
What's going on?"
"Sorry 47,
but everything turned out OK! Said Diana."
They turned crater into a lake so they can grow food,
and they're going to change the country's name to something really long
so Americans can't find them and steal their stuff.
*That was Diana's line
"Whatever Diana. Do you have a job for me or not?"
"Yeah. Hang on I'll get the instructions."
Shit
Fuck
Fuck?
"OK I have the instructions now." Diana said
when 47 had gotten to the Chilly house
where the first mission of the fourth game happened.
"The target is a crazy ex Russian hooker
who thinks you're in love with her.
Besides ruining our secrets
our client also got a petition
from a bunch of people who want to kill her
for some odd reason.
Then we want you to steal a suitcase in the cellar.
Diana heard some bang over the phone
and 47 said "Sorry what did you say?
I didn't have silencer on."
Diana checked the map and saw target had already been dead.
Oh. Thank you 47.
Now just enter basement and take the suitcase."
47 stayed idling in the jungle woods
when guards came.
Now 47 did not have patience to wait for guards
so he could be a silent assassin this time
so he walked behind one guard,
took out his silent pistol, and shot him in the head.
The other guard took out his warlike talkie
and told the other guards
guards that his partner had been shot,
and looked for killer.
But Agent 47 had already walked behind the other guard
and shot a runoff into his head.
But it was still not safe to us their uniforms.
So 47 tried something else.
47 then walked into the compound
through the front door,
and all the guards screamed
Because Mr. 47 was wearing a guard uniform
he got from the last time he was there.
While everyone was locking themselves into room to cry
47 went into the cellar
and began looking for the suitcase.
He found it by a guy who was doing something
to a machine in a HASMAT suit.
The guy looked at 47 weird
behind the suit so Agent 47 said
"Boo. I am a ghost.
Ghosts are real and I have seen them.
Now I am one too
so you need to go away
before I make you one."
"NOOOOOOO!"
and then the other guy ran away.
47 took the suitcase,
but also noticed that
there was a bomb in the cellar,
and that the timer had just been set,
so he ran outside
and rode away on his bike as it exploded.
So 47 used his concentration
to dial his cell phone while riding
and called Diana.
"They tried to blow me up again!
"Sorry 47."
"Our client is a dick Diana!"
47 scowled.
"don't we do background checks?"
"We did, but the guy who did that didn't like us,
and you killed him after he bought a Franchise."
"This sucks.
Diana, can I beat up our client?"
Can I hit him...
Hard?
"Sure 47.
He's in Reno the General right now."
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