[bass guitar riff]
Hello BookTube my name is Cait and this is my channel ChapterCVIII so I have not
been as active in video making the past couple of weeks? maybe? I dunno. I don't know when the last time I was
active um but I I know I have had a definite decrease in my productivity
video wise because it's the end of the year I have a lot going on everybody's
got a lot going on it's just a lot everything's a lot I wasn't actually
intending to do a video like this however I've seen quite a few booktubers
do you know their 2019 goal videos and those have quickly become one of my
favorite videos to watch this week so I'm gonna be doing that now because
goals can be so many different things I want to make my goals split up into
three different parts so it's going to be my bookish goals or reading goals, my
channel goals, and then my personal goals so if you only want to watch one part of
that I probably won't put timestamps anywhere but you can probably like
fast-forward around and figure it out if you really really want to skip me only
hurts a little bit [sad music] they ask you how you are you just need to say that you're
fine when you're not really fine but you just can't get into it because they
would never understand [end music] section one is my reading goals so we'll go with that
first now usually when you think reading goals a lot of people think of their
Goodreads reading goal and I don't put a lot of value on my Goodreads reading
goal and there's a lot of reasons for that the first year I set a Goodreads
reading goal I set it at 100 and I started at the very beginning the Year on
New Year's Eve like I started reading on New Year's Eve so I counted it I started
reading on Year's Eve and I got to 50 books by the end of June and I slowed
down the month of June and then I stopped reading all together at the end
of June so I was on track to get to 100 and then I didn't do it and then this
year something similar happened I didn't actually start reading this year until
May like really reading and I set my goal for I think 50 I think I made
sixty something at this point and I haven't really been reading since the
beginning in November so only really read from May to the beginning of
November again it wasn't very consistent throughout the year when I set a reading
goal I don't set it with the expectation that I'm either going to meet it or not
meet it but I set it as a way of encouraging myself to keep going
obviously this year didn't work so well I did keep you know I did complete my
goal so maybe next year I need to set it higher that way I will keep on keeping on... keeping on... blrblplbrbl
beyond whatever I think I'm gonna set my goal again I 100 so that way I can keep
going the entire year and if I reach 100 pretty quickly then I'd probably go up
to 150 we'll see how it goes I don't know I'm unpredictable I don't
understand myself I don't know how anyone deals with me on top of an actual number of books I
want to read I have some other goals in my book here in January my intention is
to read all books that I've been given for Christmas so any book that was sent
to me by a booktube friends or any books that were given to me by my family
members my husband obviously he's a family member for any other friends um
but really the only people in my life that give me books or BookTube people and
husband so any books that I was given for Christmas I want to read in January
after Christmas I realized that this goal was unrealistic for me and I'm
going to be now reading one book from each person who gave me a book for
Christmas and this picture is extremely unflattering so we're going to go ahead
and turn that off now if it's a series or a trilogy I'm going to attempt to
read the first book in that thing trilogy series duology whatever but
that's gonna be what I'm going to try and do in January yeah
my second goal is to read a couple of high fantasy series I did a video like a
while back it was like books on my husband wants me to read and I did tell
him that in 2019 I'm gonna try and read at least like one per month that he
wants me to read you know just because I would like to kind of get into what he
would he likes reading and he also is gonna start reading a couple more of the books that
I like so we're gonna try that do that you know where readers whatever and most
of what he reads that I usually go towards is the high san...
high sanity? feries? ...most of what he reads I don't immediately reach for are those
high fantasy series that are like really long I love high fantasy but typically I
don't go through those really really long series because they're such a
commitment like Wheel of Time and the Malazan series he's also read like every
Star Wars book in the now Legends extended universe
I've read a couple of things in there like one trilogy and part of a series
but he's like read all of them because he has that sort of patience and
diligence to read just a hundred something books so in a universe I'm
going to attempt to do more of that kind of become more dedicated to the worlds
that I'm reading about because if I you know on a book there's no point in
me owning it if I'm not gonna reread it that's not true I love having them next
one is finishing books that I started this year so it in 2018 because there's
a lot of books that I started this year and did not finish the next one is to
read more genres typically I go for fantasy and sci-fi I have been reading a
little bit more contemporary this past year because of my green ribbon book
club we read books that have mental illness representation and a lot of the
ones that have really accurate representation or that actually call it
by the diagnosis name are contemporaries so we I have been reading a lot of
contemporary books which is not my favorite genre at all but I am trying to
read more mental illness representations so um I'm actually going to be looking
for it a lot in some fantasy um and science fiction because I would love to
see it done well and not done an insulting way maybe we'll find something I dunno
but some of the genres that I would really like to get more into are horror
I do have a couple of horror books that I really want to read like Horrorstör I
have now which I'm so excited thank you Samantha I really want to read
The Haunting of Hill House I watch the series I loved it I really want to read the
book plus I was watching Stripped Cover Lit's video and they just talked
about Shirley Jackson the writer and how she wrote the short story The Lottery
and I didn't realize that it was the same author and I loved that short story
even though it disturbed me deeply when I first read it and there's a couple
other there's a couple of Stephen King books that I want to get to and other
horror books that I would like to get to another genre would be historical
fiction I have a handful of historical fiction books I used to actually really love
historical fiction when I was in like middle school um I would read these
books I can't remember what they were I feel like they were somehow related to
like American Girl company or something but they were written like journals by
these girls in different points of history and I really really loved those
at the time I don't know if it was the formatting or what it was but I really liked it but I
just have some really cool like historical fiction I want to get into
and the last sort of genre it's not really a genre but type of book that I
want to read is more obscure books like really weird books just weird funky
books books that don't take things quite seriously and if you didn't see my
twelve books of Christmas video one of those books definitely [operatic singing] Space Opera! [speaking] and I cannot wait
to read that book another bookish goal which is semi personal and semi
bookish is to kind of stick to a spending plan if you haven't seen my
video about spending plans and books that you should totally check it out
there's been a big conversation on consumerism on booktube lately my video
on consumerism wasn't labeled as such even though it totally is about my
reasons for spending so much looks but also how you can sort of change your
spending habits if you want to so I really want to stick to my spending plan
that I kind of discussed in there that I would try out and that is sort of
setting how many books I can buy by how many books I've read that way that I'm
actually consuming books I'm not just buying things I'm not reading them but I
really want to try using my local library more libraries are amazing
resources I like to own my books however I think a lot of reason I don't use the
libraries because when I walk in a library I get a lot of anxiety it's very
quiet and I feel big and clunky and like I'm gonna run into something or make a
lot of noise or something or people are staring at me and my social anxiety just
kicks into high gear when I'm in the library and I don't know why I just just
do you don't think it'd be like it is but it do I'm gonna try and desensitize
myself to that because the library has a lot of awesome like classes and group
things that happen as well I'm not just there for the books but like just it's a
cool place to go my next section is my channel goals for 2019
so any things related to my BookTube channel my number one goal is to improve
the quality of my videos I would like to get some equipment to make my lighting a
little bit better and make me not so anxious about the way my skin looks
since filming this video I actually received a ring light and an editing
program as well as a nice microphone from my husband for Christmas I also
want to be more detailed in my planning of my videos I want to have more of an
outline when I go in and I have done that for quite a few of my videos but I
would like to do that a little bit more because I have a tendency to if I don't
have a plan I kind of zone out when I'm talking and I'll have to talk around
myself until I find my way back to the subject and I either have to crop that
you know segment a video up or I have to cut it all together after we do it or I
just end up leaving it in and looking stupid also I think since I do a lot of discussion
videos that's the best way to get my points across is to have sort of a plan
going in or at least a more detailed plan going in my next thing is to be
more diligent about captioning my videos I've done this for quite a few of my
videos but not anywhere near all of my videos I have a really hard time sitting
there in captioning attention it's just just not there for it and I talk very
fast and I mumble a lot and I type very fast too but I always have such a hard
time just focusing to caption things so I am trying to get more diligent about
captioning because since I have been learning ASL and since I you know have
been appreciating that language there's no reason for me to make my videos not
accessible to the people that use the language the most it feels like i'm
appropriating their culture by learning their language if i'm not going to make
my videos accessible to them i also want to incorporate more of my other
interests into my channel so more music more maybe art because i haven't done a
lot of that recently more writing because i haven't done as much of that
recently so i want to incorporate some of these other interests that i have
into my channel because i feel like that will make my content more diverse on my
channel i'm also hoping to incorporate more vlogs on my channel I'm really
really bad about vlogs i did a small one for the Read Up Greenville um thing that
i went to I'm hoping to go to Book Con this coming year and at that I would
definitely like to get more vlogging than there I think
it's gonna be easier for me to do that at events but I also want to vlog
different things that I've tried I want to do reading vlogs I want to vlog
during ReadAThons or ReadALongs that I do because I really I've started so many
vlogs and tried to do them during those weeks and then I just don't keep up with
it so I feel like I really want to be more cognizant of that when it's going
on I also want to network more on like Instagram I'm really bad at Instagram I
really am I don't have any consistency in my style I don't remember to take
pictures and when I do I'll take like three I post from all and it's just I
don't I don't plan I don't set them out I don't really have a good surface to do
it I want to work more on trying to never put myself on Instagram and and do
more creative things on there because I feel like it would be a good way for me
to connect more even more with the community I would really like to kind of
put this more out there because it is a really important hobby to me it's
something that takes up a lot of my time and a lot of my life and I would like
people to know that I'm doing it my next thought is that I really want to
schedule my videos more have a more regular upload schedule and I don't know
how that's gonna work out for me I would like to become more regulated with my
uploads but I don't know if I'm gonna have like an upload schedule
specifically because of the way my moods are up and down so often I can't I'm not
really reliable to myself reading wise video wise blah blah blah blah I mean
even like this month I've tried to read so many different books in the past few
months I've tried to film so many videos in the past few months
yesterday I was trying to film the booktube recognition tag and I had a lot
of drive off sudden and then immediately it fell apart once I like finally got
all my stuff fixed to where I could do it so um I'm not reliable enough at the
moment to make a plan and then the last goal is the one that some people you
know are totally on board for some people think that you shouldn't set
these kind of goals however I would very much like to have 2,000 subscribers by
the end of 2019 I know right now I don't even have 1,000 subscribers but I'm
hoping to have 2,000 by the end of 2019 my reasoning for this yes I want to gain
subscribers everybody wants to gain some drivers whether they said they do or
don't I feel like after you kind of reach a certain point like 1000 on
YouTube your your videos are more likely to pop up at other people's feeds and
more likely to connect with more people and that's what I really want out of
this experience I want to connect with as many people as possible I want to
have opportunities from this I want to be able to you know do a lot of cool
things and I feel like the more you have the more sort of resources you have that
sense you might disagree this you might not and that's totally you know that's
fine just from my view I feel like I would have even more sort of opportunity
with a lot of things if I had more subscribers so I would like to work
towards that because I like to make videos I love making videos and I would
love more people to see what I am creating and putting all my time and
effort into not the people that are here not important I very much value
those people and I very much value the friendships the connections that I have
made so far but I always want I always want to make more connections always
want to make you know more impact to meet more people and I feel like that
that is the way to sort of do that the next section is my more personal goal so
these are things that are really not so much book related but more my personal
things I want to achieve the first one of course is to continue learning
American Sign Language I started learning it when I was very little like
just simple basic things and then I took two semesters in college and I loved it
absolutely loved it there's a really big Deaf community around where the city
where my college was and then where I currently work in a psychiatric facility
I've had a couple of deaf patients and I've only been able to talk very very
minimally with them and being a deaf patient in a psychiatric hospital or no
one can speak to you has got to be the worst thing ever and I would like to
make that environment more accessible to those individuals the next one is I
really want to do more song writing I don't write songs a lot for a music
therapy person and somebody who's in a band like I don't write enough songs
that's just that's it in the band that I am in the guitar player writes most of
the songs I've written a couple of them and I'll make up the melody to whatever
he writes or all complete things I'll add things and that's great
but I would very much love to start writing a little bit more I have a lot
of words in my brain I just have such a hard time fitting them to music the next
one is more exercising and healthy eating I feel like I have not been
taking very good care of myself and I would like to take better care of myself
it's as simple as that that I want to feel better I want to be more
financially responsible umm a big part of my financial impulsivity is to do
with my mania when I experienced that and that's a huge symptom of bipolar
disorder is manic spending obsessive spending I haven't gotten myself into
like deep trouble or anything yet when it comes to that but I feel like if I
don't do that as much I will have more money for opportunities that I want you
know like going on trips long vacations buying gifts for people
that I love buying clothes I don't buy clothes for myself very often and that
so I end up wearing the same things over and over again and then I don't feel so
good because you know I'm not wearing things that I'm comfortable and so my
next goal is I want to be more present have a really hard time staying present
in the moment staying focused I really want to work on my mindfulness and
practicing being in the moment more and a lot of the reason that I have a hard
time with this is because my mental illness as much as I want to you know
improve on it a lot of is my mental illnesses is but I feel like the way
that I can really improve on this is I want to get back into therapy I've been
out of therapy for a year now I'm gonna get back on meds I've been off meds for
like two years maybe a year and a half I think it has I think it's been over two
years honestly I have so many amazing people in my life that support me I feel
like I'm not doing things to the best of my ability because of not being on
medications and a big part of me not wanting to be on medications is because
it makes you feel like a zombie so hopefully I can avoid that zombie
feeling and get the right mix of things where I don't like I'm losing myself but
that's all of my goals for 2019 we'll see if I get there hopefully I get there
um maybe we'll do a check in next year or a reaction video to this who knows I don't
know we'll see but if I don't reach these goals I just keep trying and
that's all life is it's just constantly trying to grow and trying to
improve and trying to get closer to completing the work in progress that is
our lives anyway that's all I have for y'all leave some of your 2019 goals below
and I will comment back to you I'm usually pretty good about getting back
to comments usually but if you'd like more of this junk, subscribe below
bye! [awesome rock music] tripping over shadows and I'm drowning in the night I feel the soldiers coming I'm done
putting up a fight I feel my eyelids closing under the weight of the world it feels
like the end.
For more infomation >> What should I stop doing to live a healthy life? 2019 Steps - Duration: 11:26. 
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