and the heavier it is in you because the people have varying degrees of density
in their pain body the more likely it is that it'll drive you into consciousness
because the pain gets too much I can't believe like that anymore and then
suddenly you notice it when it arises the first sign of it you may be able to
catch a little event triggering an enormous reaction and you notice that
emotional movement inside you your present what then happens we don't know
the pain body may still arise depending on your degree of presence strange thing
happens when the pain body comes up it uses an opportunity we mentioned the car
could be your partner who makes a remark or comment that the pain body can use as
an opportunity to arise what did you mean when you say that are you accusing
me why are you accusing me I wasn't accusing you friend yes you were
accusing and to observe it then as it arises whether you can do that depends
on your degree of craisins and it's quite possible that you can detect it
for most people it works like this they become conscious just after it's
happened the pain body episode has happened the pain body came up a drama
developed perhaps with your partner or at work or some other member of your
family or even with a stranger drama developed there most perhaps a lot of
shouting and writing and then pain body-fat itself on the emotional pain
and then subsided and went back to its dormant
state and then some consciousness comes back what was that what was all that
about sometimes partners can do it after the
drama they can both say what was all that about and then you think how did it
start we can't even remember what the whole thing was about in some cases they
can't remember how it all started it was about nothing in many cases much
ado about nothing Shakespeare's play and then they become conscious there was our
pain body or there was my pain body that was it okay well let's see if next time
we can catch it a little bit sooner and then usually it arises in one person
before it triggers the reaction in the other so it can sometimes happen that
one partner remains conscious and observes the arising of the pain body in
the other and then perhaps can either point it out or if that's too dangerous
can can simply be intensely present in the body and simply be there as and
aware presence and non reacting presence but that requires great intensity of
presence because the pain body's clever very clever it knows the weak points
where you're most likely to react or if you think is all too much for you you
can quietly walk out of the room but who knows what happens after that
of course as you know it's easier to see it in others and in yourself and if
you're genuinely present and say there's your pain body it's starting the other
person may become conscious at that moment and say yeah you're right
or the pain body may already have taken possession of their thoughts and so the
person can no longer see it and a pain body then will never admit that he or
she is the pain body of course if you ask are you the pain body they would not
admit to it but they would probably tell you that you are the pain roadie or
throw something at you or deny the whole thing all that nonsense about pain body
so pain body is a great challenge it is not personal it does not mean there's
something wrong with you usually as presence arises a gap between the ending
of the pain body episode and the arising of conscious presence when you recognize
what has happened gets shorter and shorter I trust you you might need an
hour or two after an episode and then or even a day and then you look back what
happened yesterday oh that was and then that shortens and then you may be able
to be present either when it's not yet either has not fully arisen yet and it's
very early stages that of any motion reaction trying to move into your mind
and you may be able to catch it then watch it may be able to catch it as it
begins to subside the episode is coming to an end and gradually you're getting
tired of the drama it's exhausting of course and at that moment pain what is
still partly there you catch didn't say how I can still feel it that is it also
happens very frequently that the pain body when it needs to feed on more pain
comes up and you are there very present very large and you see it so it meets
the light of presence and usually it may stick around for a little while to see
if it can get through there somewhere presents by the way is not holding it
down presents never exerts any effort on anything
it never resists anything presents never holds the pain body down in any way that
is a dangerous thing one could do that through willpower
I have no negative emotion because I'm spiritually advanced I'm just not seeing
them I'm just not this don't exist and of course then they'll come out where
you in very strange ways so you cannot hold to the plane body down you can't
for a short while and then it'll come up in the strangest ways and you do the
weirdest things including physical violence or you inflict cruelty on
people and don't even know it or you make your body very ill for the pain
body has no other outlet it can become very destructive an unexpressed emotion
churning around you for years so presence never pushes it down it's
simply a light into which it comes that's all the light of presence the
light of awareness the light of consciousness the Prain body comes into
the light the strange thing is it doesn't like the light
so it will either try to obscure the light so that it can continue to pretend
to be you it can take you over and become you for a while and live through
you the emotion wants to live again through you
another form of reincarnation the emotion wants to live again
through you it wants to relive what it already knows what it makes up its
energy field and so it cannot do that when there's presence who you are
actually there as the consciousness which watches then it can't do it so it
makes for a while it'll try you can see it comes up the little entity and
there's a light shining on it and then it may try again
coming up and you still give to watch it and then it tends to shrink back into a
little dark corner it waits for better opportunity it's fine this is how
consciousness works it doesn't mean you're now totally free of pain body
just in that moment it's gone down it's you're too conscious can't come in the
evening perhaps it'll find a better opportunity when you lose consciousness
through watching a certain politician on TV or your partner comes home late from
work where have you been
some upset happens one drink too many and there's his chance or her chance in
males they're quite a few I don't know the percentage of the population it is
frequently happens that in certain males the pain body comes up particularly when
they drink too much and so if they lose the their level of consciousness that
they normally have which may not be that high even at the best of times but when
they get drunk it goes down considerably and so often
violence is associated with being drunk in his perhaps what 10% of men they
become physically violent when when they become unconscious through alcohol and
they do dreadful things and then when they're sober again
how could I have done such a thing I don't know what came over me
and some have that cycle with their partner physically abusive and so of
course when they're a little bit more conscious they always promise was the
last time it won't happen again no that's not the pain what he's speaking
that's them speaking when there's a little bit more consciousness and of
course it will happen again unless presence truly comes into their lives so
in some cases you may have to physically remove yourself from a destructive pain
body if change otherwise it's not happening or would take too long
you would not survive two more years with that person perhaps in that case
you cannot stay around it would be too dangerous that person will then go it's
on his or her own way and evolve it in their own time so
Payne body meets presents shrinks back then waits for a better opportunity but
as presents arises there's even the possibility that you could detect an
active pain body in you even in the midst of it even in the midst of it it
is possible to wake up and suddenly realize what's happening you are acting
out old emotional pain and at that moment that happens a dissociation
between that entire emotional field and yourself
it's like stepping out of a of a roll out of an energy field you were in it
and suddenly you step out of that phantom self you step out and there you
see it it's still there active still in you still doing what it does maybe still
you're waving your arms about or whatever it is and you know at that
moment there may still be words coming out of your mouth you you and at that
moment you see it and then it cannot last very much longer at least not right
there it doesn't mean it's gone forever but then it'll quickly shrink again back
consciousness and pain what it cannot coexist for long and every time you
bring presents to it the pain body cannot renew itself so it can only play
out its old energy the more you can be present with it the less can it use you
to renew itself and so what happens then to the pain body the energy becomes
freed that was trapped in there and many people carrying so much pain that they
can't do much else in their lives that absorb so much of their aliveness that
they have little left to live their life the emotional pain and this is in the
case of dense pain bodies the emotional pain is so much that it consumes them
it's like a Paris it consumes them all there liveness and
as to be bring consciousness to eight that trapped energy becomes freed and he
was trapped at a low frequency if you could hear it something like that you
wouldn't want to listen to a radio station for too long like that and so
that becomes freed but it is life energy it is a life 'no sultanate li and
there's an increasing sense of aliveness that you feel because the energy leaves
it strapped into the pain body i sometimes compared to a piece of heavy
woods that's being burned so a coal the coal is transmuted into
fire the flame of consciousness first it was dark and heavy substance and
suddenly the dark and heavy substance burns it becomes a flame it becomes a
transmutation into pure energy beautiful and that is the beauty of it
why ultimately whatever is is fine as it is or even the human pain but he has a
function and that is that it provides fuel for consciousness the pain
ultimately it becomes your spiritual teacher one of your spiritual teachers
and for some people their main spiritual teacher i'd say for me it was my main
spiritual teacher because i couldn't live with him any longer so i couldn't
live with myself any longer and a large part of myself when that realization
came to me as a thought i cannot live with myself any longer a large part of
who I felt myself to be consisted of emotional pain
and that just became unbearable and that's why I'm here now so the the
mechanism there of ultimately what is ego induced pain pain induced through
unconscious living through ego pain body
egoic living creates pain suffering it even needs the continuation of pain
because the ego and the pain body they both need conflict they both need
further pain the ego needs it to define itself through the other the enemy the
not me it needs the boundary around itself it
needs to create opposition in order to feel itself it needs somebody to
disagree with me for example so that I can feel that I'm right he's wrong and
him being right the delusion of Who I am grows a little bit I need that if
everybody agrees with me I would begin to lose my artificial sense of self my
mind made sense of self often the collective identity that is in certain
religions largely consists of the unbelievers those who are not asked give
us our identity we define ourselves through those unbelievers they give us
our sense of who we are not there suddenly they all became believers we
would be at a loss who are we now they are all in possession of the truth now
so we lose our identity as the possessors of the truth everybody's in
possession of the truth who are we if we had peace with everybody and we don't
have enemies who are we if we don't define ourselves through our enemies not
only collectively also personally people define themselves through their
problematic life situation all the problems in their life situation make up
my life me in my life so the
artificially induced sense of self disappears pain is not who you are it's
simply an energy it lives in you for a while and then becomes transmuted become
friendly with your pain body may not yet be thankful for it I'm thankful now but
at that time I wasn't thankful become friendly with your pain body this is the
most powerful transformative tool so to speak because very often what manifests
in the present moment is the pain body in you so if you are not making the now
into an enemy if you become friendly with a now that Wiltse mean at times you
have to become friendly with the pain body because your experiencing that
emotion now it's part of what is now and that is becoming friendly with it simply
accept that it's there there it is I can feel it that implies of course that you
know it's there which in turn implies of course that there's enough presence for
you to see it you cannot become friendly with the pain body if you don't see it
and the pain body's nature is not being friendly in itself
so when you are the pain body you cannot become friendly with the present moment
that's not what the pain what he does so you see how it connects it's based on
presence if there's presence in you then you can accept it then you can be
friendly with it if there's not enough presence you can't be friendly with the
pain body because then you are the pain body and the pain but is not friendly
but once you are able to detect it and it's all that's required to know it's
there then you can bring acceptance rate and say oh yeah there it is
whatever or simply just watch feel it Wow feel the the raw emotion of it feel
even the need to wanting someone else to draw in and make him or her part of that
emotion feel what it feels like directly what does it feel like in you as an
energy field amazing so here watching it that's all that's all that's needed so
you cannot really watch it internally if you don't fully accept it and you cannot
fully accept it if you're not there as the witness as the watcher of it and
that's all that's needed so pain body nothing wrong with you human humanity in
its present evolutionary stage you can't escape that the present evolutionary
stage of humanity has plain body nothing personal
not a problem not your personal dilemma
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